The Consequences of Being Open and Vulnerable

I shared the pictures of my daughter on Facebook. I had the fear that when I posted these someone was liable to come along and hate on them. Someone was liable to come along and hit me hard in a place where I’m vulnerable.

baby pics

I’m grateful that so many people said nice things there, but I do them knowing that I might get punched right in the face. I know that I’m going to get hit with things that hurt and I’m okay with that. I go forward doing things knowing that I’ll get smacked right in the place that hurts most. I’m doing this post because it’s the right thing today.

I didn’t want to do it because I don’t like to cry and look vulnerable. It hurts when you get hit with things in life. I’m willing to get hit with everything I need to get hit with to be a better person for you to be a person that can help you. If you want to do things in life that are good, that helps people, sometimes you have to get hit in the face. Sometimes you have to get dumped and sometimes you have to get hurt, right in the spot you least like to get hurt. Sometimes you have to be vulnerable. Sometimes you have to share things that you never want to tell anyone about.

The amazing thing is the strength that comes from being able to do this. Infinite strength comes from being willing to take the worst things you never wanted to hear. This comment hurts.

facebook comment

It’s been a week and it still hurts. It hurts because I’ve always saw my little girl as this beautiful perfect angel. It hurts because life is not one-sided. Any point of view is just as true as another. This is a lesson from the creator to help me.

I look at the world as a life where there’s one relationship between me and my creator with all of you here as my brothers. As long as my brother is sick, suffering, and miserable, then it’s up to me to serve my brothers and sisters here. It’s up to me to do whatever it takes to serve you, help you, and give you what you need. It’s up to me to lead by example as someone who has a wonderful life and as someone who used to say things like this.

This hurts especially because I did this. I did this to a girl in my graduate school. She has a god son that she loved so much and was posting pictures all the time. I told the entire class that I thought he was ugly. I hurts because I understand the suffering of my brothers and sisters. I’m willing to stay here and work with it and experience the hurt that comes from working with the pain of others. I’m willing to put myself out there and get shot down. I’m willing to stand up knowing I’ll get shot down again.

That’s how my daughter learns to walk. That’s how she’s growing so much because she’s willing to try crawling. When she can’t hardly move, she’s willing to fall down on her face and try and get back up again. She’s willing to flail and look around for help. She’s willing to be hungry, thirsty, and miserable so she can keep growing. She’s not hungry and miserable often, but she’s willing to go through these things in life because of love. Love is why the pain and suffering is worth is.

I shared this comment in my support group the other day and how much it hurt. A lot of people said mean things about this person. I love the person who shared that just the same as I love you. I love them the same as I love my family. I love them just as much as I love my brothers, an equal from the creator who is no better or worse than me.

I understand their suffering and I’m here to lead by example and to show that you can have a wonderful life. You can be vulnerable like a baby, you can cry. You can fall down and have infinite strength where life is worth living, especially when it hurts. It’s worth living when it’s happy, when it’s sad, and when you don’t look good in front of everyone else. I posted this video knowing that someone is going to resonate with this video. I will help someone.

You can’t give me anything that you’re not already feeling yourself. You can’t give me a negative hurt emotion that you aren’t already suffering with. My daughter gets upset when she falls asleep. She get’s miserable and flails her arms around and won’t go to sleep.

This is what works for me to help her go to sleep. I look at her, no pats on the back and no singing. I look at her and say I love you, I’m happy and peaceful, I’m willing to feel how you feel if you’re willing to feel how I feel. I will take your pain and hurt and suffering. I will walk through it with you to the point where we both can be peaceful and I sit and cry with her on the couch. I’ve sat and cried with her a lot and my wife is amazed. We both sit and cry together and after a few minutes of that, we both are quiet and go to sleep.

That’s an amazing thing to be able to do in life. I’m willing to feel how you feel because I know that is the infinite love and peace of the universe. I know that I can feel pain and suffering and return back to peace.

Even through tears, I’m happy and fully alive right now. This is a wonderful feeling to be vulnerable with you as a brother, an equal, someone who’s no better than you. I’m someone who’s no worse than you, someone who’s been the sick person that needed to helped. I’m someone who’s more likely to make that comment most of their life than most other people. I’m thankful I don’t have to do that today. Living like that is a place I couldn’t take anymore. I couldn’t take living like that. I prayed and asked to be given a different life and I’ve been given one.

In exchange for this life I’ve been given that is peaceful, it’s up to me to share that with you. I have a life that’s wonderful and I offer that with you in the understanding that I’m willing to  feel how your life is. I’m willing to understand it so I can talk to you and effectively serve you today. I’m willing to cry every day if that’s what it takes. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make this life of service. I’m willing to look stupid and weak and vulnerable if I can reach you with what you need to see.

I want to give you courage so you can do what you need to do today and have a great life that you deserve to have. I remember the thousands that I shared this because I was willing to take the hurtful comment. I was willing to suffer the pain knowing  there were thousands of you that would say thank you. There were thousands of you that would take the time to hit this post and take the time to say thank you, happy new year.

I’m willing to take the pain to do the most good today. That’s a miracle because a lot of my life I was too scared to take that step. I was too scared to put myself out there. I was too scared to invest myself in something and put myself into something enough to get shot down. I’m willing to keep falling if it’s in the line of service for you. If I can keep helping you the way a waiter might wait on you in a restaurant. I’ll keep doing my best today for you.

It’s for me, too. When I give you the love and peace and happiness, it comes back to me. When I give it again it comes back to me until I have peace, love and happiness in my life. When I mess something up that I can say Jerry, it’s okay you messed that up. Instead of going off on myself and hating on myself, I can love and say you’re not perfect, it’s okay. You are perfect in that image and yet, there will always be ways to see how you can improve also. Thank you for reading this, I am honored you’re here. Have a great day.