What is the truth about me? This is worth thinking about. I believe things about myself but when I examine them I often find that the things I believe aren’t true. Living a good life starts with being a wholehearted person and feeling like a complete person. You don’t wan to feel smashed into a certain role as a husband, worker, dad, online instructor or gamer. I’m here and fully me in every single situation. I hope this is useful for you in thinking about in your life.
I find that when I’m a wholehearted person in every part of my life, I don’t tend to play games. I don’t try to manage all the stress of playing several roles. For example, when I got my best friend and my wife together for the first time I felt the stress of playing the best friend role and the husband role. I was afraid that what they got to know of me wouldn’t be the same thing.
I was afraid they would get to see the inconsistencies about me as a person. Now, I try to look and see the inconsistency myself. I try to get to know who I am because what more worthwhile thing is there to do in life than get to know who you are.
For example, when I look at who am I, I think about what’s true of me. Let’s take the look based on what people say after watching my videos. Some people call me hateful names and disgusting terms. They say I am an awful person or they hope something bad happens to me. Then there’s lots of people that love my videos, appreciate what I do and feel like I inspire them and help them. Which one of those are true?
You would think both of those don’t exist at the same time. There is no way I can be this great, inspiring person and this disgusting, awful person at the same time. That is what I’m getting at with this question of who am I and what is the truth about me. To me, I can see truth in both statements, I can see that I’m an inspiring person and I can see truth in that I’m ordinary. I’m annoying, I’m a pain in the butt. I can see the truth in there because that allows me to be a wholehearted person. Wholehearted people have wholehearted feelings. That means sometimes I might feel like I’m angry and frustrated and upset. I’m happy and joyous and free and having a great life. I can see some of these at the same time and that’s how a wholehearted person feels.
A wholehearted person feels the good things and the bad often at the exact same time. I try to feel the good and bad in life at the same time because that’s an honest way of living. If I’m not feeling the good and the bad, if I’m seeing only one part as true then I’m at risk of becoming distorted.
For example, if I only believe that I’m a great person and everyone in the world thinks I’m an inspiring person then I’m liable to get a distorted outlook on who I am. I’m liable to start thinking I’m this great person. Then I’m likely to prove what an ordinary, awful or bad person out of that. I embrace reality today because then I don’t have to go through the process of proving anything to anyone. I can be here with you today and be myself, whatever that needs to be for you. I don’t have to try to put on a show. I can just show up here and say look, here I am, this is me doing my best. Then I can face the fact that if you don’t like my best, that’s the best I can do. If you don’t like who I am, that’s the best I have to offer, there’s no role I can play that’s any more than I can offer, I’m at full capacity already. It’s scary to be all in like that and really be looking at it and asking what happens if I give my all and people don’t like me. What happens if I try as hard as I can at this job and I don’t get promoted. What happens if I try my best and it’s not good enough? What does that mean about me?
That’s a great thing. If you embrace all sides of reality, it doesn’t mean anything about you. You’re a regular person who has regular ordinary problems, there’s nothing wrong with that. That’s what I want to be today, a regular, ordinary person that there’s nothing wrong with any more than there’s something right with. I feel a great sense of belonging with my fellow human beings when I see that I’m an ordinary person. It’s lonely at the top. It’s lonely to feel like you’re the only person that knows how to do anything. It’s lonely to think that no one else understands you and no one else gets you. It’s really lonely to think that everyone on some level understands where I’m coming from and that’s the benefit of being an ordinary person.
You are in good company. When you’re a superstar, it’s hard to find real friends, it’s hard to find a regular ordinary life. Most of us want a regular, ordinary life that’s filled with happiness. That’s all I want today. When I ask who I am, it helps me to look at who I am. It helps me to not get in to being an egomaniac like I’ve been most of my life.
An egomaniac is someone who thinks a lot of themselves and unreasonably little of them self at the same time. It’s a person who has to prove how good they are all the time. They’re desperate that you’re going to find out that they’re not good enough.
Today, I pray to look at who I am and discover that I’m just an ordinary person who’s here to do my best. I’m no better and no worse than anyone else. I am a person that has a chance at living a good life today as long as I remember what I’m sharing with you. I pray today to always be willing to look at all different sides of who I think I am. I pray to be willing to look at the good, the bad, and the ugly that comes from being one version of me or the other. I pray that you have the same opportunity that I do today to look at the good, bad, and ugly about who you are. I pray that you see that you have infinite potential and that you can do your best today. Thank you for reading this. I hope you have a great day today.