How can you find a way to be happy when some problem is seeming to overwhelm you? What do I do to stay focused and happy and present when some problem is overwhelming me?
This is what I do and this is a great video I’m making now because this has just happened to me in the last few hours. It’s been a while since a problem has overwhelmed me so much and in the last few hours I’ve been kind of overwhelmed by a problem I’ve had with my YouTube channel.
Here’s how to stay happy and positive because any kind of thing like this that would’ve happened to me in the past would’ve been just horrible. Now it is still a challenge but it’s bearable, it’s manageable. There’s a certain group of things I do that I will tell you about that makes it easier for you to deal with a problem that’s overwhelming you in your life.
You might not need it right in this moment, but here’s the thing. I’ve found often when I’m struggling I’ve already heard something before that can help me in the moment when I need it. I hope this advice is like that for you.
Here is what I do when a problem’s overwhelming me. I try to focus on the space between me and the problem. I try and create space around the problem. If you listen to Eckhart Tolle which I know a lot of people following me do so you might or if you haven’t yet, I listen to Eckhart Tolle a lot and a lot of what I deliver sounds a lot like what he says. The idea is I want space around whatever the problem is and me.
If I am wrapped up in the problem completely and if I am the problem, then it’s utter misery and utter hell. What I try and do is constantly open up a little bit of space because when the problem, whatever it is, happens, when you get a phone call, when you get dumped, when you get a problem with your YouTube channel, whatever it is, no matter how big or small it may seem to someone else, it will seem huge to you and it does to me. Whatever it is, at first, there’s likely to be no space.
Last night when I first saw the problem with my YouTube channel, there was no space. I am the problem. I’m completely wrapped up in the problem. I am the problem, everything is wrapped completely up in me in the problem. What I try and do is open up little bits of space to get it to the point where the problem is very far away and I can really take a look at the problem.
Let me explain the ways I do this because just saying it might not make much sense. I try and separate who I am from the problems I may be having now. Things like the sprinkler may not be working, that’s a lot of distance between me and that problem. It doesn’t kind of hit me personally like an ego. It’s a problem that’s there, but it’s not really a problem right this second. it’s something I might want to fix in the future, but still qualifies what most people might see as a problem.
When something happens to my YouTube channel and I think this could be massive and might impact my whole business. That’s the kind of problems I’m talking about. It could also be relationship problems, I’m grateful not to have many of those now. I often get problems that are business and those kind of problems that make you freak out. I try and make space. Prayer gives me a lot of space and it doesn’t matter who you pray to, it’s the act of praying and reaching out to the universe for help and admitting and loving yourself enough to say whoa, I need help with this.
The worst problems I had in my life have been greatly helped by prayer. When I reached out and said “Okay God, the universe, me, whatever you want to call it, I need help and I’ll do anything to make that help real.” Help doesn’t usually just fall on you except maybe to get something started to go to a support group for the first time, that help might kind of fall on you, but still you’ve got to do work for the help.
The help you get is in the work you do. I’m making this video to do work. To do something to serve other people, to serve you, to share something with you that might help you in a time when you need it and when you are struggling. These times kind of jump on you. Everything is fine, we’re walking down the street and – oh gosh, what is this problem that’s jumped up on me? You’re walking down the street and all of the sudden that wide open spacious life you have just goes into this problem. You can feel like you’re whole life is ruined because of this problem.
I try and put some space around it, prayer helps a lot. Whether you believe or don’t believe in a specific higher power, the action of prayer tends to help a lot. Getting down on your knees to pray can be very helpful and I’ve got a lot of love and support from my followers around the world that say they don’t have a lot of the problems I have because they already have a life of faith and prayer and they take it for granted. I hope this in that sense will express that people of my country are trying to do more of this together and share our faith and be one with everyone that has faith. I’m grateful that after ignoring prayer most of my life, I now go to prayer first. The sooner I go to prayer, the sooner I get a little relief. It’s not complete, it’s not instant, it’s not total usually, occasionally it is.
Here’s what I try to do. Imagine this problem as a complete bubble. What I try to do is keep popping that bubble. Pop that bubble and of course it will keep blowing up again and I keep popping it. Telling myself it isn’t a big deal and I don’t mean just trying to disavow it or not acknowledge it. It’s not a big deal, I’m going to die and everything’s going to fade in my whole life, this whole problem is not a big deal in that context right now. Most everything in my life is wonderful right now. Let me not ruin all of that by just looking at this problem.
I try and do service work also, help other people, call someone else and share my problem with other people and you’ll find if you share a problem you’re having less in a complaining way and more in an I’m hurting, this is what’s going on kind of way, you’ll find that people will do it back with you. They’ll say that’s funny, this is what’s going on and then your collective hurting is not as bad. I’m grateful I talked to my friend a little bit last night. I said, “I’m hurting, this is what’s going on.” He said I’m hurting, this is what’s going on.” We both felt a little bit better, it opened up a little more space, it popped that problem bubble again.
I don’t need complete and total relief immediately. That’s another thing is to accept that this is here for a reason. There’s nothing that you get or that I get or that anyone get’s that’s not here for reason. It’s not up to me to understand the reason why I’m getting this right now, it’s up to me to try and find what good I can do with this. What can I produce out of this that’s useful, that’s helpful? Maybe I can make a video sharing how I get thorough problems while I actually am in one so it doesn’t sound so much like preaching from a distance. Like if you have a problem over there, that sucks my life’s just perfect. I don’t know what those are. I can make a video here today and I’m continually popping a problem bubble that comes up right now and I’m showing you right now that I can still have a wonderful life even as one of the worst kind of problems I experience in my life feels like it’s starting to clamp down on me.
One of the biggest parts of my ego is the most offended and ready to lash out and just punch. That I hope can be useful for you. I call people, I continue to do the things I normally do. What I used to do was try and numb the pain. I would sit and play video games all day or head to the liquor store and get drunk.
I got my LSAT scores, same kind of problem. I got my LSAT scores in college and I thought OMG these are so low, I still was in a pretty good percentile, I could’ve easily went to law school, but I thought they were so bad I just got wasted out of my mind and by the end of the night I couldn’t remember who I was or what they LSAT was. That’s how I used to deal with problems and that was horrible because I would just get new problems.
What I’m sharing with you right now does not cause new problems which is awesome. It accepts the things and really there are no problems. This is not a real problem I’m having, nothing, not even dying or losing everyone you care about is a real problem because it’s all part of the universe’s master plan. The only problem I can have is to look out at the universe and say “you really screwed that one up!” The only real problem I can have is to look out at life and say “this is totally messed up or this is totally wrong.” That’s the only problem I can have.
It helps me to see that the only real problem I can ever have is rejecting life and saying no to life on life’s terms. That simplifies all my problems. There are certain forms life will take that will encourage you to say no more than certain other forms, but ultimately if you want to be free of your problems you’ve got to ultimately look at your problems and say yes, this is fine as if you chose this, as if you’ve chosen the exact situation you’re in and say “yes, that’s exactly what I ordered on the menu.” Whether it’s colon cancer, or you’re about to die, we all get to do something like that someday and it’s not a problem if you’re okay with it.
Today I pray let me now be all focused and upset in my own problems. Let me say yes to life on life’s terms and let me do good work, service work. Let me use this challenge in my life to help myself and help you deal with the challenges in your life. I pray that the pain I feel can be shared with you to help you better understand and deal with your pain. I pray to be the best person I can be and to always accept life on life’s terms.
I hope this is useful for you in having a great day today.