I’m thankful I learned a cool life lesson yesterday and I’ll share it with you here. It takes no patience to be where you are at this moment. What does that mean?
For example, you’re waiting for something to happen or trying to get some more exciting places. It takes no patience to be where you re at. It takes patience to be where you are at when you think there’s somewhere better you can go or something better you can be doing. This means all patience comes from having to deal with the idea that something you’re going to be doing later is better than now. In other words if you’re happy with where you are right now, if you can find peace, you don’t need patience. Patience is just being able to sit where you’re at and be thankful for it. You don’t need patience as long as you aren’t setting yourself up to become impatient. This might not have made sense to me a lot of my life so I’ll do my best to keep explaining it.
For example, yesterday I thought about the importance of being a good driver. A good driver allows other people drive without having to adjust to their driving. Good drivers are predictable and boring. I have been an aggressive driver, weaving in and out and driving fast and it forces a good drivers to adapt. To me, a good driver is someone who doesn’t’ force other people to adapt to your driving.
It’s someone who is a passive driver and not a car on the road that’s breaking hard and weaving in and out of traffic. I ended up sitting behind the car that was driving ten or twenty under the speed limit. Normally, I would’ve zoomed around and passed them.
Yesterday I learned the lesson that there’s no patience required to be where you’re at. Patience is only required if I decide there’s somewhere better I ought to be. There’s nothing worse or better about sitting behind that car. There’s nothing better or worse about doing that than there is about making this video or doing anything else throughout the day. The magic to me is to seeing that I create the need for patience.
There aren’t things that need patience in and of themselves. There are things that I judge as not good enough. There are things I judge as boring. There are things I judge as wrong. There are things I judge as something better I could be doing. Those situations then create pain because you’re always right where you’re at. So am I.
You can’t escape being right where you are. That’s a constant. Where you are will change on its own. You’ll move from place to place, you’ll do different things. To try and make it change faster or to get mad that it’s not changing faster creates pain and suffering.
Almost all the driving I did my whole life was painful because all I wanted to do was be somewhere else. Driving was just a means to an end. I was an aggressive driver, I tried to blast through traffic as fast as I could. I’d drive as fast as I could get away with.
I’m thankful I often get examples while I’m making videos that you could see exactly what I’m talking about. My dogs started barking in the background and that’s the same opportunity as what I’m talking about. My dogs barking is no different from them not barking. Does it make a good video? No.
When my dog starts barking, the right thing for me to do is stop talking on the video and edit out the section where I was silent. I don’ t imagine you’d want to watch me sit there and stare at the screen. You could do that yourself, I suppose. That is a perfect example right there. I had the opportunity to get mad at where I was at. I had the opportunity to say stop barking or go on about how bad my dogs were. I choose not to do that. Instead, I chose to sit here. I chose to understand that me looking at the screen is just as good as me sitting here talking on the screen. It’s just as good. Life is just as good at each moment. The dogs barking is not something that’s getting in the way of what I’m trying to do. The dogs barking is life on life’s terms. Life gives you things and if you resist and say that’s not right, then what you do is get miserable. I accept it. That’s simple.
You might wonder what does it matter or what difference does it make. It matters because you get all this negative energy and then life is crap. Then when you try to go somewhere, you have to be somewhere else to be happy. When you go through life criticizing things around you, criticizing yourself and other people. When you go on pointing out how things aren’t good enough then you create the need to be where things are good enough. You could use a Disney vacation. You think if we go to Disney, everything will be magical and wonderful. The kids will be happy, my wife will be happy, I’ll be happy. Then everything will be great. Then what happens? You plan all this stress out and spend a lot of money. You realize it’s just like any other day except it’s more stressful because you thought going to Disney would be different.
I see a lot of people at Disney who are stressed out. The kids are crying, dad is drinking a lot, and mom is yelling at everyone. It’s hard to say that that’s any better than what normally goes on. Yet, you spend all this money to go do the same thing you do every day. Disney is wonderful. I love going to Disney. I’ve been lots of times and I’ll go lots more times. When I used to go to Disney I felt like that’s a place I can be happy. Yet, I wouldn’t be patient on the way to Disney. I would rush to get to Disney.
Then I would have to have patience at Disney. I have to wait in lines and then I would get on a ride for one minute. Or there will be a dark ride like Tower of Terror and someone would have their phone on and then I would have to be patient. One of the few spots I planned to just be present was disrupted. Then by the time I’m getting home I’m lucky to have a few minutes of fun in the day.
It takes patience if you’re unhappy where you are to wait to go somewhere where you will be happy. You don’t need patience if you’re happy where you are and the miracle is to see that you can be happy wherever you are, whatever you’re doing. You don’t need anything else to be happy. You don’t need a perfect life, you don’t need lots of money. You don’t need to be in the perfect place. You don’t need to be a part of the perfect group or organization. You don’t need to be perfect at whatever you’re doing that’s important. You can be happy at any moment of your life. You don’t need anything else to be happy there and that is been a huge gift for me to discover.
I used to live a life where I thought I had to be certain places to be happy. I thought I had to be at home drinking for me to be happy where I could be myself. I thought I had to be at Disney with my wife where I could be happy and be myself. I thought I had to be home with my family to be happy and be myself. I thought I had to have things like health. The nice thing is all you have to do is be right here in this moment. You can be anywhere any time you don’t need anything else. To me that’s an amazing thing to learn and I hope I’ve shared that with you so you can share that same joy. You can be wherever you’re at and be happy wherever you’re at. Know that you don’t need to go anywhere else or do anything else to be happy. I hear people say if you do all these things you can have eternal life. If you work hard, you can have eternal life. If you believe in certain things you can have eternal life. You already have eternal life.
You don’t remember being born and yet, you know you were born. Being what you are is what you always have done and always will do. The only choice is to whether you will like where you are or not like where you are. Whether you will say yes to where you are or no to where you are. That’s the only choice there is. The proof of that is you can never remember any time besides being here in the moment, now. That’s all I can ever remember doing. That’s all I can ever do is be here in the moment and that’s great. That means I have everything I ever could need right here in this moment so it takes no patience to live in that state. It takes no tolerance to live in that state because it is a state of patience and tolerance already.
I pray that I remember this lesson throughout the day. I pray that I remember I need no patience to be where I’m at. I pray that I bring it into each situation I have throughout the day, even when the vet brings me my bill for bringing in the dogs. I pray that I remember I don’t need any patience to be where I’m at and I’m grateful to be alive today. I pray that in sharing this with you that you have the chance to have the same knowledge and experience yourself if that’s what you would like. Thank you for being here with me today, I’d love your feedback. I hope you have a great day today.