From Struggling to Having a Blast
I am now having a blast dating in 2026, even though I just made a video a couple of days ago asking, is anyone having fun dating in 2026, while I was struggling. The amazing thing is that literally the day after I published that video, I met a woman right where I had planned in a video before it even happened — where I said I had found the best place to meet women. I met a woman at a fitness class who absolutely blew me away, and it felt magical. It seems like she felt the exact same way. Now I'm having so much fun, thinking, oh my God, this is what dating is supposed to feel like — euphoric and super happy, waking up so glad I have a date scheduled with her tomorrow, with so much compatibility.
And yet it's been since October 2025 when I got separated. That's three months last year and seven months this year — ten months of consistent misses and tiny bits of excitement. Then, just a couple of days ago, all of that changed with meeting one single person. I want to help you get ready for that yourself, because what I can say is that I've been working on this. I've been ready for it. I've been paying attention.
Calling Out for My Queen
In fact, on Saturday night I was in some acute distress, and I actually yelled out loud something addressed to the woman who will be my queen — the woman I'll make a beautiful life with, build a family with, and ideally stay together with for the rest of our lives. I literally hollered out something like, "You better quit screwing around, because I'm ready to meet you right now. I'm tired of waiting." And then, less than 48 hours later, I'm at this hot Power Flow yoga class.
I went to the gym with what I had said before in my videos very much in mind — that I'll never ask a woman out again. I'm not doing that. I'm not trying to ask a woman out until she starts a conversation with me. Then I happened to hear this woman talking about being a content creator, and I'm just standing there. The woman who was talking to her walks away, and she's standing there by herself. I find her very attractive, and I know I've got to do something. I've got a serious amount of conversation and confidence I can approach with in this situation. I think of my video, and I think, fuck it — this is an exception.
A friend I had just talked with last week said, "You know, you've kind of swung on the pendulum — you were approaching every woman all the time, and now you're over it and not going to approach any woman. The ideal scenario would be to be in the middle." I also had a conversation with another friend, and he said he's proud of himself, and that what helps him feel good is taking a risk. I've often thought taking a risk is something I don't feel good about. But what I've noticed is that taking a risk — not a dumb risk, like driving my car on the other side of the road, that's insane, I'm not talking about that kind of risk — but taking a risk where there could be a potentially very high reward does feel good.
The Approach at Yoga
So I saw this woman standing there. I've seen her at class before, but we'd never had any interaction at all. And I just thought, I have to do this right now. I've got to approach her, because there's almost nothing to lose if I do. You know what? If she doesn't like me, that's fine — I've dealt with that all year. But if we do have being a content creator in common, there's a lot that could happen.
So I walked up to her and said, "I heard you talking about this," and she said, "Yeah, I'm very interested in that." And I told her, "I just thought that was really interesting, because I started doing that — I quit my corporate job to do that. Wow, I'm proud of you. I'm a YouTuber — that's why what you were saying caught my attention." She got very curious from there, and we ended up talking for an hour after the class.
At one point, about 20 minutes into the conversation, she dropped her phone. Now, meanwhile, I'm thinking, I'm not asking for her number — I'm going to make her ask for my number first. But then she drops her phone, and I'm like, okay, I think you dropping your phone was a sign you want my number. I made it fun, too — I just made it kind of funny.
Why This One Flowed
What's cool is that I've had so many interactions with women in the last year that just did not flow properly. And what about when I was married? Actually, I had a lot fewer interactions that didn't flow properly when I was married. This particular woman — the two of us are just aligned. It's easy to talk and flirt with her, to banter and be playful, when with a lot of the women I've run into, it's not been like that.
Then again, I came out and approached with massive confidence, because I'm like, you want to talk about content creation? I have so much knowledge about that. I made sure to talk to her about content creation and give her value first in the interaction — I was essentially doing a little free YouTube coaching with her, analyzing and asking her all about her content, which, of course, she was very interested in talking about. From there, I transitioned into dating and figuring out that she's single, because she asked about my YouTube channels, and I said I have a dating channel. Then I started sharing some things from the dating channel, and because of that, she opened up and talked about her dating life, and I realized she is very much single. And I'm like, it would just be crazy to not do anything right here. That would be insane.
So we exchanged numbers. After that, I told her, "Why don't we not bother messing around on the phone? I've got you here in person right now. Let's plan a date right now — I'll just get my calendar out." She was very enthusiastic about it, and we got the date planned. Then we talked 30 more minutes after that. I was hot from standing outside in the sun in Florida after doing a hot power flow yoga class, and my mouth was dry. She gave me some of her water because mine ran out — I forgot my water bottle that day. We were both ready to go after that. I saw that she was ready to go, and I let her go when she finally got ready to leave. And man, the last two days since that interaction have been so good.
Open Your Heart and Give It a Chance
I just hope someone out there watching my videos will have the faith that you never know. You never know when you're about to have a magical interaction happen with someone that may just totally change your life. Meeting this woman reminds me of meeting my ex and the way I felt about her. I've had some very deep feelings come up, like, immediately — and not just wanting and fantasy, but I love how I feel.
We've had an awesome time texting each other. I've actually struggled with most women to be flirty or playful or to maintain a text conversation. It's my turn to respond to her right now, and I could scroll back — we've sent 40 or so text messages in the last couple of days. She did take about five hours to respond once in the morning, but then she was very responsive after that. And I've just constantly crushed any of my own little insecurities, telling myself: give this woman a chance. Open your heart. Give this woman a chance. Trust her.
I told my mom how enthusiastic I was last night, and my mom said, "I'm just afraid that with you being this excited, you'll get hurt." And I said, "Mom, I can handle being hurt. What I can't handle is not giving my heart a chance to open — not giving a woman who seems to have so much in common with me a chance to let something beautiful happen." I'm willing to fail over and over again if needed. Trying to play it safe and guarded — I've done a bit of that over the last ten months, thinking, ooh, I'm not going to get too excited with her. And yet now I'm like, let's go. Let's see what happens.
Fuel From the Critics
Some people have even put out videos and made comments criticizing my dating content, and you all are giving me so much fuel. I'm thinking, when I get my next girlfriend and fiancée and wife and mother of my next children, I'm just going to do video after video burying those cockroaches. I'm going to bury you all with 200 videos with my amazing woman.
And if it works out with this woman — she's a content creator also. I've pictured that I could potentially partner with her and have the Jerry Banfield Family be something where you could talk to both of us, and I'd split the money with her. Oh my God — if I could partner up with another content creator, we could just print money. How many of you would love to talk to me and my girlfriend or wife? I know there are a lot of you who would love, even if it's just once, to hear her opinion on my situation. Meeting this woman has just inspired all these ideas. I've decided that whoever my next woman is, she's going to be a woman who's comfortable creating content with me, and I'm going to put that out there right away. I want to make videos together, and we're going to crush all these haters.
I know some of you might read this and be really happy for me — like, thank God, Jerry might make it. And some of you might feel a little jealousy: man, that's nice that happened for you, but when is that going to happen for me? And I say: you never know, but ask for it. Be honest that you want it. There have been nights I've laid in bed and cried, just thinking, I really, really want the woman I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. I really, really want it so bad. A lot of us are afraid to even look at something and feel it, because it kind of hurts to feel something that acutely — to feel how bad you want something you don't have.
Focusing on the Connection Before You Meet
But here's the thing. I've come to believe that I'm telepathically connected to whoever the next woman is who will be my wife, and that we're going to have an amazing relationship. Especially last month, I've zoomed in on focusing on that connection, and that helps me be ready when I run into her in person. That was Saturday night — I was calling out loud to her, like, come on, I'm tired of waiting for you.
Some women have been critical, saying my videos have been just transactional, and they definitely had that feel a few months ago. What I hope I'm communicating is that, to me, dating should feel magical. And I don't care who you are, what you look like, or where you're at — there's magic that's available right now. I saw a YouTube video of what looked like a beautiful woman to me with a guy who was disabled. And I've seen a very big woman — a woman I didn't find very attractive — with a guy most of you would call a Chad, just a beautiful, big, tall man. So I'm telling you: no matter who you are, no matter what you look like, there's an amazing relationship that is there for you.
The Algorithm Is Incentivized to Keep You Miserable
Never watch content from people telling you anything besides that, because it will sabotage you. In my experience, a lot of the content that's on YouTube is meant to sabotage you. The algorithms reward junk content that will essentially waste your time and keep you miserable — because when you have a happy relationship, you don't need some dating coach, do you? Once you've got a happy relationship, you don't need to watch 50 videos about how dating is broken anymore. The way I see it, the system is incentivized to keep you broken, dependent, and frustrated, because from there you're easy to manipulate and control. My videos are designed to help you be empowered, to see the magic that's in life, to see the ability you have to co-create the universe. And you can talk to me every week — if you're feeling hopeless, if you're feeling like there's no magic, if you feel like you've never had a great partnership, that's exactly who I want to talk with.
I was amazed talking to this woman. This is a woman I think is beautiful — just gorgeous. And it sounds like I've been on a lot more dates this year than she has, which is kind of wild. But I've been putting in the effort.
Putting In the Effort Is How You Get the Result
Some people have made content about me and criticized the effort I've put in — and putting in the effort is how you get the result. I've gone out with 10 to 15 different women this year, on 20-plus different dates. I've not done anything besides a little bit of kissing with any of these women. And yet I've learned so much about myself, so that when I approached the woman I met a couple of days ago, I approached with my maximum confidence. I approached with lessons I've learned from all kinds of things not going well.
What she was really impressed with were the conversations I had. She was really impressed that I'm out there talking about things like, "Okay, so how often do you think is ideal for us to text each other before we meet up for our date?" She was impressed that I would even think to ask that — it doesn't have to be this unknown. I told her that's because I've been tired of going through that with women, where we should have talked about it on the date instead of having this uncomfortable period of figuring it out over the phone. I said there are two extremes: I could just text you all the time, or, on the other extreme — we've got this date scheduled — I could just not talk to you for three days. She said, "Well, that would definitely be weird. You don't have to constantly text me all the time either." But I've learned now that she prefers more attention rather than less — she would much prefer texting most of the day instead of me not replying. And her main thing was: don't play games with me. Don't artificially try to have distance or play weird games.
We had another great conversation, too. She was telling me about her experience texting guys, feeling like she shouldn't text something and then just texting it anyway — and then that ends up ending things. Her attitude was, "I'm glad I sent that, because if he didn't want to hear that, then I shouldn't keep seeing him." Some of the texts I've sent her, I felt a little vulnerable sending. But I'm like, what? If she's the right woman, she's going to like the flirty message I just sent. And sometimes that's exactly what happened — I sent her a really thoughtful message, and she really liked it, and I felt so good. I'm like, nice, we're on the same page.
Always Be Getting Ready
My idea with dating is to always be getting ready, and then put yourself in a position to meet the right person. If you're just sitting at home all the time on dating apps, especially as a man, in my experience you have almost no chance of meeting the right person. It's absolutely insane to try to optimize your dating profile when you could put yourself in the opposite situation, where you put the odds in your favor. Every time I go to a power yoga flow class, I'm putting the odds in my favor. I'm just amazed how many single women are in these classes and are very interested. Whereas I doubt this woman would have been messaging me on a dating app. In fact, it's quite possible I dropped her a like on a dating app and didn't stand out — she either didn't see my profile at all, or swiped by it, or scrolled by it in her likes. But when she sees me in person, and sees my confidence, and sees my strength at a yoga class, and sees that we have that in common, there's an entirely different response.
I hope this gives you so much hope, because you can see, if you watch that video from a couple of days ago, the struggle I was in the middle of. But in that struggle, I called out and made it very clear: I'll do whatever it takes to meet the right woman. And then I was ready. This is how magical life is. What if I don't go to that yoga class at that exact time? What if I don't put my mat in that exact position? What if I'm not carefully listening to this other woman's conversation, 10 or 15 feet away from me? What if I'm not paying that much attention? I've been to the yoga studio on a lot of days like that where I wasn't paying that clear attention. And even when I was, I wasn't bold enough to just walk in and say, "Look, I heard what you're talking about — here's how I fit into that conversation." And in some of the situations where even that happened, I wasn't confident enough to bring the energy to turn it into a phone number and a date, and then educated enough in dating to discuss clear, concrete things like how to handle communication on the phone and all that. So I am confident that if you will get ready, if you will do the work to prepare to be with the person you want and build a plan to meet someone, you will turn opportunities like this into amazing relationships that last.
Validation, Discernment, and Never Giving Up Again
I'm so excited, because whether it works out with this particular woman or not, I'm getting insane validation from the universe that I'm doing the right work. I also have a date scheduled through my matchmaking service — it's just a virtual date, so I'll just be talking. And I have another woman I know where we're both very aligned on our values; I don't know if she's that into me or not, but we're aligned. Then I have another woman who texted me a flirty message yesterday, and we're very aligned — we've already been out on dates. And then the woman I went out with a little while ago texted me yesterday also. It's like the women are getting the sense that I'm about to go off the market.
It's also what I'm doing, though. Especially when I got separated, I was kind of putting out this really hurt energy. My confidence was broken after being in a relationship, and I felt bad about the divorce and everything. I had to cry on the massage table yesterday — I choked out saying how much I regret being so willing to leave my ex. With the next woman, I'm going to be more discerning and be very careful about who I get into a relationship with. But once I make that commitment and we go further and further down the road, I'm not leaving. I'm staying. For me, divorce is not an option next time. If the woman demands a divorce, that's one thing, but it's not something I'm going to go along with. I was way too willing to get divorced. And it was so good yesterday — I've done things like crying on the massage table over how much I regret being so willing to give up on the relationship with my ex. Now, I'm very happy with where it's at today, because this has been helpful for me. But I'm going to do whatever it takes to never be in that position again.
Someone in Your Corner
If you want to have an amazing date — if you want to have an amazing life — the number one thing you can do isn't just watching videos, unless you can do what I do, where I can take information from a video and almost instantaneously test it, analyze it, and think it through. But even then, the best thing you can do is have someone to talk to who you know will be empathetic, who you know is on your side, who is not preaching some extreme advice, but is down to earth and wants beautiful relationships for as many people as possible. That is what I have to offer. I should charge thousands of dollars a month for that — other people do. And yet I want to start working with as many of you as possible with the least resistance, which is why you can join the Jerry Banfield Family and have weekly calls with me. There's nothing better you're going to pay for in the world of dating — I know, because I've spent over $10,000 of my own money on it. There's so much value in having a talk with someone you can identify with, who sees the way you think and how you're operating, and who you can be accountable to.
You Don't Have to Do This Alone
One reason I've been able to do this in my dating life is because I have a lot of people I talk to who know a lot more than I do — especially a couple of men in their 70s who've dated much more than I have, who've been married and divorced, and who I am accountable to all the time.
Now, you might not have enough people like that in your life, and you can plug me in. You can add me as somebody you can talk to every week about your dating life, someone you can DM between calls, and you can post in the community and get feedback from other people. When you do that, you never know when someone amazing is going to come along naturally. If you're one of the few people who has read this far in, I would love to start talking to you one on one, and I'm confident it is worth your time and worth your money. It's probably the one thing you could do that will dramatically change the future of your dating life.
I really appreciate you reading this. If you want to follow this whole story — from struggling to loving dating in 2026 — every step of the journey is on my Dating playlist. You can help me, I can help you, and then we will help whoever else you get connected with because of this.