I'm reading this book, Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch, and I thought, you know what, there should be something like this for crypto. So I'm going to do a version of that right now. I normally like to live stream, but the roofer is about to come put a new roof on my house, so I feel a little sneaky cranking this out before the roofers start making noise.
The idea is a conversation where I ask God, or my higher self, or the universe, or whatever you want to call it — some smarter entity, some massive power out there — to explain all the questions I have about crypto. If you have some of the same questions and frustrations I do, I think you'll really enjoy this. I keep going deeper on all of this in my ICP Crypto playlist, but this one is more of a heart-to-heart than a price chart.
Dear God, when will the ICP price pump?
So the first thing I would ask is: dear God, when will the ICP price pump?
And then God says, "Jerry, what's the ICP price today?" I look at the chart and I say, well, at the time I'm recording this, it just went under $10.
"Well, Jerry, what was the price of ICP when you bought it a little over a year ago?" And I'd say, well, it was a little under $3.
"So, Jerry, the price went up three times in the last year. Wouldn't you call that a pump?" Well, yeah, I mean, sure. But when are we going to go to $100 or $1,000?
"Well, Jerry, isn't three times in a single year enough for you?" Well, we could do better, though, right? I want to be a millionaire. I'm impatient for ICP to pump. Why isn't it going higher faster?
I gave you Bitcoin, but why didn't you receive it?
"Well, Jerry, remember when I showed you Bitcoin in 2014 and you got it as low as $170? What's the price for that today?"
Well, it's like $100,000. I know it's like $300,000 from where I had it. And all I had to do was hold it, and I'd have had $300,000.
"So what happened with that, Jerry? I showed you something that pumped to $300,000, and what did you do with it?"
Well, I sold it at like $5,000 or $10,000, and I've regretted it ever since.
"So why did you do that, Jerry? I gave you just what you wanted. I gave it to you, but why didn't you receive it?"
I was impatient. I wanted it faster. I wanted more. I wanted to pay off all my debts. I wanted to be a millionaire. I wanted total financial freedom.
"Well, Jerry, all you had to do was wait. You had enough Bitcoin to be a millionaire today. I gave you that. You had enough Bitcoin when I first showed it to you, when I brought that guy by your office to tell you about it randomly — someone who didn't even know you, and he told you about it. You had three thousand-some dollars in the bank at the time that you could invest, and today you would be a millionaire. I gave you what you wanted, but why don't you have it today? I gave it to you."
Well, I guess maybe I didn't want it that much, based on my actions.
"Well, Jerry, you still want to be debt free. You still are struggling with financial freedom. And Jerry, I've given you Internet Computer. This is even better than Bitcoin. So why are you so impatient for the price to pump when I've given you all the research to show you that this is where things are going? This is where the future's headed. You're in the right position. I've even given you a lesson with Bitcoin, so now you know. The price will pump when everybody else buys it and when they're ready for it. But the price already pumped." That's the same conviction behind why I see 21 Bitcoin in 2014 as 550 ICP today.
I know, God, but I want it now. I want it faster. I'm afraid that I'll screw this up again. I want the money right now. I want my house paid off right now. I want my student loans and my business debt — I want all of it paid off right now.
Do you have everything you need today?
"Well, why, Jerry? Why do you want it all paid off right now? Look at your life. Look at your studio. How much equipment do you have in here? Do you not have everything you need today, Jerry?"
I do. I do have everything I need today.
"Well, Jerry, do you have everything you want today?"
Yeah, I guess. Yeah, I do have everything I want, too.
"You mean you have everything you need and everything you want? And is that enough?"
Well, no, it's not enough, because I might not have everything I need and want in the future.
"Oh, and why do you think that? If you have everything you need and everything you want today, why wouldn't you still have it in the future?"
Well, because I have this massive mortgage, around $100,000 left. My wife has $160,000 in student loans. I have a hundred and something thousand dollars in business loans. And we have huge payments every month, like $4,000 a month. My wife has a great job and still can barely pay the bills. I have to make money too. If I'm not constantly working and out here grinding for money and making a profit, then we could lose everything. We could lose our house. We could be homeless, or we could be stuck living in a family member's house. Yes, I have everything now, but I feel like I'm on the edge of losing it all the time. And I'm tired of feeling like that.
I felt like I was on the edge of losing it constantly. That's why I couldn't hold onto the Bitcoin — because I was afraid that when the Bitcoin price pumped, I was going to lose it, that it was just temporary. It went up to $1,700 after I bought it as low as $170, and I was afraid it was going to reverse, that I'd dump it and feel like an idiot.
Love or fear
"Oh, Jerry, I see we've hit on a key topic here, and that's that you're afraid. So the way I've set the universe up, there are two basic choices. There's love — where love and gratitude and joy all go together. So when you love, you're also grateful, and there's joy. When you love how things are, that's one choice. Or the other choice is that you are afraid. You're afraid of how things might be. You're afraid now of what might happen later. Or you love now, and whatever you are now is like you're praying to me for that to happen."
"So if I see you love how things are, and that's what you're focused on, then I give you more of that. From my point of view, if you love how things are, then you're going to get more of that. There's nothing to be afraid of. But if you're afraid of how things are now, that's you saying that you don't like how things are now, that you're not happy with the ICP price, that you're not happy with all the stuff I've given you. And to me, that is a prayer for more of the same — that you'd like circumstances in the future that will give you the same feeling."
"So the question for you is, Jerry: are you happy with the ICP price today? Are you happy with all the things you have now? Do you have faith that if you are happy where you're at now, then you're going to be happy with where you're at in the future?"
Well, see, God, that's where I have the issue. Honestly, no, I'm not happy with the ICP price today. It's $9.52 on CoinMarketCap. It slipped all the way down to number 30. There are all these dumpster fires and crappy projects above it. There are things ripping people off, things lying and cheating and stealing from people, projects that are meme coins and absolute copies. The whole market is stupid. ICP is undervalued right now. I'm impatient to be right. I've told everybody how great ICP is, but I don't look right, right now. Bitcoin has done just about the same, if not better than ICP over the last year. Some of these altcoins have done better. I know I'm not happy with how it is now. It should be higher.
"Well, Jerry, if you're not happy with how it is now, then how do you think things are going to be later? If you can't be happy with where it is today and be part of the journey, then to me, you're asking for more of the same in the future. If you're afraid that you're going to be unhappy with it, if you're angry now because you think things aren't good enough now, then to me, you're asking for more of the same. You're telling me that's what you're focusing on. And what you think about and focus on, to me, is what you love. That's where you're paying attention."
Who set the prices of all those other coins?
"So I'm looking at all these other questions you asked, too. You said there are all these things above ICP that are scams and liars. And Jerry, who do you think made those the prices they're at today?"
Well, I suppose other people, buying and selling and trading those other cryptocurrencies. They did that.
"Yes, Jerry, they did that. That's not up to you. That's up to them. They have the right to create the world. They've bought and sold and accumulated the cryptocurrencies that they've chosen to accumulate, for the reasons they've chosen to accumulate them. And while you may be right about the intentions behind some of them, are the people not free to do whatever they want with whatever currencies they want? Have I not given you free will to say what you want, to invest where you want, to do what you want? And shouldn't other people have that same right?"
"If I just made it clear to everybody that ICP was the future and all these other coins were destroyed, and then ICP did a thousand-plus and everybody knew you were right — would you be happy then?"
You know, God, that's a really good question. Because if you did that, all my social medias and YouTube channels and my OpenChat — everything would blow up. I'd be getting huge amounts of attention. I might be such a known figure that everybody would want stuff out of me. It would be like those people who win the lottery, where you get so much money that all your friends and family feel entitled to a share of your cash. So I imagine all my friends and family would be asking me for money. I imagine I'd have such a high net worth in that scenario, and so many people would know me and want to talk to me, that I'd probably have to move.
I don't think I could live in the same house in the same neighborhood. I'd probably need to gate myself off from the world and be in a gated community. If it really did that, and it did it fast and dramatically, that might actually destroy the life I have in a lot of ways. If it happened slowly, it'd probably be fine — I could gently adjust to it. But yes, if that happened overnight, that'd probably be pretty bad.
I gave you fame, and how did that go?
"Well, Jerry, in the past, you asked me — you wanted more views and you wanted to be famous. And I gave that to you rapidly several times. How did that go for you?"
Well, I didn't like it. I found it very uncomfortable, and it was never enough. It was never enough.
"So, Jerry, I see a common theme here: that what I give you is not enough. I give you Bitcoin, and then that wasn't enough. Then you get into these other cryptos that lie and cheat and steal from you, and then that's somehow my fault. Then I give you the people who follow you, you want to make millions of dollars, I give you that — but then you spend the money, and you don't like being famous, because when you're famous, everybody wants stuff out of you all the time. I give you all these things, Jerry, and they're never enough for you."
"So the question is: at what point are the things I give you enough? At what point can you just be happy with what I've given you today, and know that when you're happy with what I've given you today, I'm going to keep giving you more of the same? And really, it's not me giving it to you — it's you. I give you everything you ask for all the time. It's just that you're often not happy with the things you ask for when you get them."
Would you really be happy if ICP was $10,000 today?
"Would you really be happy if the ICP price was $10,000 today, Jerry? If the ICP price was $10,000 today, how much money would you have in liquid ICP? Would you be afraid of losing that money, Jerry? Remember when you bought $10,000 of Dash and it went up to $87,000 in just a few months, because that's what you asked for, and I showed you exactly how to do it? Remember how scared you felt when you looked at your Dash wallet and saw that anyone could just take all that money from you? You'd never had so much money in one place that somebody could steal so easily."
"So I have to ask you, Jerry: if you have 819 ICP today sitting there liquid, plus thousands more, what happens when that 819 ICP turns into $10,000 each? What happens when you've got $8 million sitting there liquid? Are you going to sell all of it immediately? Are you going to pay off all your debt? Then what? Let's say you've got $5 million in the bank after you pay your taxes and your debt. Then what, Jerry? Will that be enough for you, or will you want something else then, too?"
Man, it's a good question. I figure if that happened — if the ICP price today was $10,000 — yes, I would sell enough to pay all the taxes and pay all my debt off. And I'd be very happy about that, for today. But then tomorrow, what would tomorrow be like? Tomorrow, I'd probably still be very happy. But what would it be like a few months in the future?
A few months in the future, I'd suddenly be used to the idea that I was debt free, and I had millions of dollars in the bank, and I'd take that for granted. And I'd take one of two basic approaches. One, I'd be a total degenerate — just start playing video games all day and say, screw it, I don't have to do anything for anybody anymore. Or the other approach: well, now that I've got this many millions, let's see if we can get to the next level. I've got $5 million in the bank — let's see if we can get to $10 million. Let's start spending some of this money to make that next few million. And if history repeated itself, soon enough I'd spend all that money and be right back to zero.
Is the ICP price good enough today?
"So, Jerry, with all this in mind: is the ICP price good enough today? Are you happy with it today?"
I wish — I feel like I can't genuinely be happy with it today. Because it was just $15 a few weeks ago, and now it's $9. That sucks. Everybody who bought it when I said to buy it is down, and I'm afraid that people are mad at me and that I look stupid.
"Well, Jerry, remember when you told everybody about Bitcoin and you were really excited about it at like $400 or $500, and then it went down to $170?"
Yes, yes, I do remember that.
"Well, they might have been mad at you when it went down. But if any of them actually held it the whole time, how do you think they feel today?"
All right. I guess they'd be pretty happy today, whether they bought it at $400 or $500 or $200 or $300. It doesn't really matter, does it?
"No. Jerry, the same thing. Do you have enough today? Are you thankful for what you have today?"
Are you thankful for what you have today?
I mean, yes, I am very thankful for what I have today. I'm glad that all I have to do for work is film this and I'm done for work. I respond to my messages on my phone and on OpenChat. I'm very thankful that's all I have to do for work. I've worked jobs like corrections, where I risked my life working in prison for $20,000 a year. I was on the street as a police officer. Yes, this is a nice arrangement, and I'm very happy with it. I'm very happy the price is up three times since I bought it. I'm very happy that a year ago I had around $10,000 in crypto and today I have around $50,000 — from that liquid ICP, plus thousands of ICP locked, plus other ICP, plus my OpenChat.
I have a wonderful wife. I have the best relationship I've ever had. My kids just went to school. The house is getting a new roof today. Every time I live stream, hundreds of people show up live, and thousands of people in total come by to watch, even though I've gone from one thing to another — deleted one platform after another, started one new channel after another — and I still have so many people who care about what I have to say today. So yes, I'm very happy today. I do love exactly where we're at today, and I just don't want to forget that, God. Why do I keep forgetting that? I'm very happy where I am today. Why do I so easily choose fear and get upset? This is the same gratitude I keep coming back to in why I invested my life savings into ICP in the first place.
Heaven is a place you're happy to be right now
"Well, that's it, Jerry. That's what this reality is about. It's a reality of two basic choices: love or fear. And the people you consider to have mastered this life — they've made the fear choice enough times that they just consciously choose love all the time. That's kind of the fun of this reality: to know the fear choice and to choose love. But you can choose the fear choice as often as you want. There's not one reality or another that you make that's right or wrong. There's no judgment. There's no hell, except the one you send yourself to, and heaven is a place that you are happy to be in right now."
"Like this, this price chart can be heaven today — proof that a year ago you were right, that you're up three times on your money, proof that there are infinite opportunities for you. So the question is: what are you going to choose today? And whatever you choose right now sets up the next experiences you have."
Well, God, I'm very grateful for this idea. I always hope I can help people on my crypto videos with more than the superficial — more than just talking about prices and charts. I hope I can help people on a deeper level, and help myself in the process: help myself to be patient and to enjoy the journey. I see that 10 years ago, you put me in the perfect position to enjoy an incredible journey. All I had to do was buy Bitcoin every day, even if it was just $50, and do a video about Bitcoin every day, and things were going to work out unbelievably well for me — in terms of all the money I wanted, all the followers I wanted, helping other people get rich. I see that 10 years ago, you put me in the perfect position for everything I wanted. And I see that today you've done the same thing again, that you always do the same thing. And I really appreciate it.
If this kind of conversation is the part of crypto you care about — the patience, the gratitude, the head and the heart, not just the price — that's exactly the kind of thing I share inside the Jerry Banfield Family, and you're welcome to come be part of it.