The question that plagued me
What is the meaning of life? This is one of the questions that really plagued me. I struggled with it: why am I here? What is the point of my life? And I've found the meaning for my life today, and I think it's a meaning many of us will find to be the exact same. So if you're struggling with life, I hope this is really helpful for finding meaning in your own. A lot of things like addiction, sadness, loneliness, and depression are caused by having a life without purpose.
I read a book called Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl, who was a concentration camp survivor. He said the number one factor he found that predicted survival in the concentration camp was whether people could find a purpose for their suffering. The people who could not find any purpose or any meaning in their suffering were generally the ones who would die. And they would die in one way or another. They'd get picked to go on some work detail, or however it would happen, they would just die. They would die of a disease. They would get chosen to go into the gas chambers that day. The number one thing he found that made a difference in whether somebody lived or died in the concentration camp was this: did their life have meaning?
Frankl's purpose in the camp
For him, he was in the concentration camp and he was a psychologist. He thought, I've got to write a book about what life is like in the concentration camp. What an amazing book, what a unique experience life in the camps would make for a book. And that was his meaning. It was his purpose. He looked at his life in the concentration camp as a great opportunity. Now, of course there was suffering and it was miserable, but he had a meaning and a purpose for his life. And that purpose was to help other people understand the meaning of their own lives.
And that purpose just kept working out to save his life. He had this very, very clear meaning and purpose, and things just seemed to work in his favor. He would get chosen. He would be in a squad, and everybody else would think they were going to a work detail, and they'd all go to the gas chambers, and he would get chosen to live. Everybody said, oh man, you're going to die. They thought he was in the gas chamber line. And then things kept going in his favor so often that it was shocking. The way he thought of it is that because his life had meaning, the universe, even in the most miserable circumstances, was there to support him. And that's what I've found in my life too. If you've got a meaning and a purpose for your life, the universe will support you.
The meaning I found: helping each other
So for me, the universal meaning and purpose for life that almost all of us can relate to is helping each other. To me, that's where we get our purpose in life. We just can't get any real purpose out of trying to get money and power. These things don't really matter. And this is why so many of us are struggling so much, because we're pursuing these kind of meaningless goals in life. We're going after things that don't really matter. And because we're living like that, we feel like life has no purpose.
To me, the meaning of life is to help others. By helping others, I feel massive joy. I know myself, and I know my own life has meaning. And helping others doesn't mean that you should do what I tell you and live how I think you should live. It means that when I help you, I understand what you need, and I try to help you have it.
Now, in my experience, helping others does not mean I just blindly and constantly self-sacrifice. That, to me, is not what we're going for here. What we're going for is helping others in a way that is also helpful to me, where I'm not just showing up and doing anything to help somebody even if it hurts me, even if I pay a price for it. That's not what I'm going for. I'm going for this: does my life truly have meaning? Right now, doing this live, I love it. There's nothing I would rather do. This is a perfect example of what I mean: I'm out here helping others, and I'm feeling great in the process of doing it. That's what I'm talking about with a meaningful life. My life has meaning. I love what I do. I'm proud of what I do. And what I do also makes a big difference to others.
Why I do what I do
There are so many of you, on my YouTube videos and wherever else it is, who have said, your video really helped, Jerry. Thank you. That video saved my life. Whatever it was, so many of you have said that so many times. And I love it. That's why I do what I do. That's why I'm here. That, to me, is the meaning of life right there. The meaning of life is to help each other and to really show up and make a difference in each other's lives. That's why we're here. And as long as I can stay aware of that, then I'm in great shape.
So the meaning of life is to help and serve others. It's not to get money and just be a big deal. It's to show up and help others and make a positive difference in people's lives. That's exactly what I'm doing, that's exactly why I do it, and that's where I get such great joy out of my life on a daily basis. I know that by showing up here I'm helping you, and I know that by showing up here I'm helping myself. If you want to walk this out alongside other people who are asking the same questions, I'd love for you to join the Jerry Banfield Family and help each other find that purpose together.
Where to start
If you don't know where to start with having a meaningful life, just ask. Set a prayer and an intention. Think about how you can help somebody today. What could you do today that would help somebody else have a better day? And then, if you really want to take it to the highest level, can you help other people all day? My whole day is set up on helping other people and loving what I do. I don't think it works if we just help other people without loving what we do, and it doesn't work to just love what we do if it's not helping other people.
So if you're not sure what to do, I guarantee this works: start asking people, how can I help you? What can I do for you today? They'll give you some suggestions, and the magic spot to hit is where the suggestion they give you sounds really exciting. Like, I would love to do that.
Here are the things I'm going to do to help people today. I'm going to meet my sponsor at a meeting. I would love to do that. I'm going to put my kids to bed. I would love to do that. I'm going to make videos that will help transform some of your lives online while I'm playing games. I would love to do that. I'm going to take my wife to the airport. I would love to do that. Earlier I helped watch my wife's sister's child. I would love to do that. I made my kids things to eat. I would love to do that. I'm helping my mother move here. I would love to do that. By doing things that help other people all day, and by making sure they're things I actually want to do, I stay in that meaningful spot.
Because if somebody comes along and says, well, I want you to just give me your car for free, that would help me, then I can set a boundary and say, no, I'm not going to do that. I would not love to do that, because if I give you my car, then I'm not going to be able to help the other people in my life as effectively without my car. So no, thank you. I would not love to give you my car, and I would not love to just throw all my money out the window. Helping others isn't self-destruction. It's help that keeps me able to help.
The surest way to be happy
The meaning of life, to me, is to help others. As it says in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, the most sure way to stay sober is to get out there and help somebody else stay sober. And that's exactly what I've found. The most sure way to be happy in my life is to go help other people be happy. The most sure way for me to get what I want is to help other people get what they want. It's really simple. If you want to keep watching how I try to live this out day to day, a lot of it is right here in my Life playlist.
I hope this was helpful, and I would love to see you live with us. If you want to talk to me and hang out, come find me and the rest of the community so we can keep helping each other and finding the meaning of life together.