The joy of making $300,000 or a lot of money in a day versus the ordinary of joy playing Paw Patrol with my daughter.
The Joy of Making $300,000 in a Day vs Playing Paw Patrol with My Daughter
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I’m grateful today I’ve had the chance to experience both of these, so that I may share something that’s helpful for you and helpful for me. Next time I get tricked into the trap of thinking that money will bring me a lot of happiness, it doesn’t.
One day I had my crypto investments, they went up about three hundred thousand dollars in one day and there was hardly any happiness from it.
This is the kind of thing my mind told me for years.
“Well, if you could just make a bunch of money you’d be so happy.”
Now, I love money. Money is awesome. I love having money.
I love giving money. I love making money. I love money.
But I also love my daughter and I’ve got her Paw Patrol characters here. I’ve got Everest, Rocky and Rubble.
I’ve got Everest, Rocky and Rubble right here and I’m reflecting on the ordinary joy of just playing around with her and her Paw Patrol characters versus the things our mind tells us will be so amazing like winning the lottery.
For me having my crypto investments go up a fortune, I’ve experienced these and I’m here to let you know there is ordinary joy available every single day that is as good as anything you could hope to accomplish.
For example, I imagine speaking frequently. I imagine speaking in front of large crowds. I speak every day in front of hundreds of people online playing video games. There are thousands of people every day watching my videos.
The joy from that, there is no more opportunity for joy and happiness than there is in an ordinary thing like helping my daughter play with her Paw Patrol friends or helping my wife out.
Some of the things that bring me the best feelings are often the most ordinary. For example, when my wife has been up with our 7-month-old son and she is tired at night, and I wake up at four in the morning all excited to do my business, I grab our son, stick him in the carrier. He sleeps, my wife sleeps, my daughter sleeps. I go out and work in my home office shed.
I feel so good after that and I’m grateful today I have no illusions that anything else I’m likely to do is going to be fantastically better than that.
I used to have all these illusions and I used to put off being happy all the time.
“Well, when I graduate college that’ll be really good. When I get a job.”
Every time I got something, the happiness was so fleeting. I used to think frequently: “Oh, when I get a girlfriend I’ll be so happy.”
Often I was very happy at the beginning of getting a girlfriend.
Some of the biggest depressions I’ve had in my life have been when I got something that I waited to be happy for, for years.
I had a huge depression after graduating from college. I was very lost, not knowing what to do with my life because for so long I said, “Well, I’ll be happy when I graduate from college.”
I worked and I struggled and I hurried to graduate from college.
Now, it has been more than ten years since I’ve graduated from college. I got a master’s degree, and I see so many people going through the same trap.
“Well, I’ll be happy when I get a girlfriend. I’ll be happy when I get married. I’ll be happy when I have a child. I’ll be happy when I have another child. I’ll be happy when I get this promotion at work.”
No, if you can’t be happy today, nothing else in the future is going to bring you happiness either. If you can’t be happy with the ordinary joys like playing Paw Patrol with your child today, you will not get anything else out of anything you are capable of doing.
This helps me plan because it helps me see a lot of my greatest happiness is just being around and helping the people that want to help me.
I go to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting almost every day.
In fact, I’m not sure. It has probably been a month since I’ve missed a day. I aim to go to at least five meetings a week and sometimes I go late. Yesterday, I went 40 minutes late and I still felt fantastic.
You know what the best part of my day was yesterday?
Even though I had thousands of people watch my gaming live stream I did, even though I had time with my family, the greatest part of my day, I went to that Alcoholics Anonymous meeting just for 20 minutes.
I got there 40 minutes late and I was there for 20 minutes. Then, I went and picked up some Subs for my family for dinner and I got home, and just had some time with my family.
I felt absolutely wonderful.
It was just an ordinary evening at home, an ordinary AA meeting seeing people, nothing spectacular was said, an ordinary thing to do to help out my family to pick up dinner, and an ordinary night with my family that was as much joy as anything else in my life and this is available every single day.
Now, you don’t have to have a family around. These are available to us in every unique form. I missed a lot of days to be happy. I missed a lot of times to be happy because I was so interested in getting somewhere else.
I remember about ten years ago I was living with my family, my mother and father at home, and I focused so much on setting the future up.
I wanted to get into grad school. I wanted to move out from living with my parents.
And thankfully, I did enjoy a lot of that time at home watching TV with my dad at night. I thank God for that time which I had feared. I had feared moving home for years because I thought it was a sign of failure if I moved home with my parents.
Once I left home at 18, I thought it was a huge sign of failure and I couldn’t move home with my parents.
Thankfully, I managed my life so poorly that at 25 years old I moved home with my parents and that year was one of the happiest before I met my wife and moved in with her.
I enjoyed on a daily basis spending time with my dad watching TV with him. I watched TV with my mother every night. I went to the gym. I enjoyed time gaming with my friends. I enjoyed time doing those ordinary things and I was so happy.
A lot of the other times in my life I had been so focused on getting something that I couldn’t stop the hustle. I couldn’t stop the drive. I couldn’t afford to just relax and experience some ordinary joy.
I thought that if I could get these things there would be much greater joy than I had experienced so far and there is not.
Now, there is nothing wrong with wanting to make money. I love making money. I imagine making millions more dollars. I imagine doing speeches in front of prestigious events and companies. I imagine doing trainings where I get paid fantastic amounts. I imagine going to another planet to represent earth, to speak.
Now, this is what I imagine, and yet I have no illusions that I can have any greater joy doing those things than just experiencing my life on a daily basis at home with my family.
Once we see this, doing those ordinary things, we see that life is amazing. Even if we don’t have money to go travel. Even if we don’t have a job at the moment. In fact, some of these things we dread can be our greatest opportunities for happiness.
My dog bit my daughter one day, and there was a lot of fear and pain. Right after that the next day, I had an absolutely wonderful joy filled day. I spent all day with my daughter. We went to the store and I started a garden.
Now, that’s the kind of thing my wife and I dreaded, our dog biting our child, and since then we have kept the dog and we have kept the child separated although we do very supervised visits now.
We have gone through that with love and the thing we dreaded for so long happened, and there was a lot of happiness behind it.
My dad dying, I dreaded that for so long and I’m so grateful for all those ordinary days I spent at home watching TV with my dad. I’m so grateful for those, and yet for so long, I feared that.
“Oh, such a sign of failure. What a loser to move home with your parents after college.”
I used to think all these dumb things like that, and today I’m so grateful to see that all of us have all the joy we could possibly want at our fingertips and if we can’t see it, if we look around and all we see is a miserable world full of stupid people that don’t care about us, then all we need to do is pray and say, “God or whoever is listening, please let me see the world in a new way.”
If you look at me and say, “I don’t see the world like you,” just pray to see the world like I do.
“God, please let me see the world how Jerry sees it. Full of beautiful people and amazing opportunities for joy and love and service and connection every day.”
Because when you feel like that, when I feel like that, there is no desire to mess it up. In fact, a desire to mess it up looks insane.
What is a desire to mess it up?
A desire to yell and scream at people.
A desire for violence.
A desire to do alcohol and drugs and other things to change our mindset.
A desire to poison our bodies with things that leave us feeling depressed.
A desire to do anything that’s unhealthy or to end it all.
When we are in the middle of our ordinary joy, it doesn’t mean we are free from fear, it doesn’t mean that every single moment is complete ecstasy.
It means we notice when our ordinary joy slips away.
I just started to get a little aggravated a minute ago, and I prayed and I said something like, “God, let me just enjoy this day.”
Something like, “I’m going to experience all the joy today.”
Another thing that works if you are in the middle and just frustrated, is thinking about how you can help somebody else.
Just thinking about yourself all the time is why we are so frequently miserable. The worst times in my life have been when I thought about other people the least. The happiest times in my life have been when I thought about other people the most.
Notice there is no money in that. I didn’t say anything about the happiest times of my life have to do with money. You being broke is no reason for you to be miserable. Some of the happiest times in my life have been when I had the least money and some of the uncomfortable times in my life have been when I’ve had lots of money.
I’m grateful today to have this to share with you and I thought, how may I help you today?
This video highlighting that things like making a bunch of money, there is nothing wrong with it. Money is not the root of all evil. Money is just an energy. It’s an idea. It’s a game we are playing. It’s fun and it’s cool.
Money allows us to do things that without it might be difficult. There is nothing wrong with making lots of money, but it won’t bring you any more happiness than anything else in the world.
I love having money to give hundred-dollar tips to my massage therapist. I love having money to be able to just give money away online.
I love to give $100 to someone for beating me in a video game. I love that. Money is great.
If we can’t find ordinary joy in our lives every single day, nothing we are going to accomplish is going to do anything except land us in a huge depression wondering what happened.
As soon as the ecstasy of accomplishing something wears off, now what?
One of the worst depressions I’ve ever had in my life, I wanted to be with a beautiful girl. A girl that absolutely anyone would be jealous of and it happened. And my God, I did not know what to do after that because so many years I said, “This is why I’m unhappy. I’m unhappy because a beautiful girl won’t love me.”
Well, look when it happens, why are you unhappy now?
Why are you unhappy now?
This is a question God might ask, “My son, my daughter, why are you unhappy when I’ve given you everything you’ve asked for?”
This is a hard question to face internally. Why am I unhappy when I’ve gotten everything I’ve prayed for?
Everything I’ve asked for has been given to me and it doesn’t matter. It’s about what we intend. I intend to be full of joy. I intend to experience all of the little joys throughout this day today.
The secret is thinking about, how may I help you?
The secret is realizing that the ordinary joys we get on a daily basis will not be outdone by the grandiosity our mind comes up with.
I hope this is useful for you today to realize that those income goals you have set, you have decided you want to make $10,000 a month or $300,000 in a day, they won’t make you any happier than ordinary joys like playing Paw Patrol.
I’m grateful, I’ve done this right in location holding the Paw Patrol characters.
I’m grateful today, I consistently choose to make sure I get that time with my family because I know how to be miserable trying to work hard to earn a bunch of money, and miss out on those daily joys with my family.
That’s a good recipe to be miserable.
I know because I’ve done it.
I love you.
You are awesome.
Edits from video transcript by Michel Gerard at www.michelgerardonline.com.