Thank You for My Third Monetized Channel
A huge thank you today for my August 17th, 2026 vlog. Thank you for helping me make this the third YouTube channel that I've had monetized this year. I might not have to move in with my mom now. How exciting. I don't know if she'll let me move in with her, but I'm really grateful for monetizing this YouTube channel. And I'm so grateful for all the time y'all have been spending on these vlogs — it's amazing. An 18% click-through rate and 11-minute watch time. Thank you. I am absolutely honored. I'm going to turn all this stuff on. And I caught myself for a second — dang, did I share any private information there? I don't think so. But maybe we'll just get rid of that background so we don't share anything we shouldn't, like my AdSense publisher number or any of that. I'm grateful we're also pretty close on getting the ad revenue. In the next few days, we're going to get the ad revenue and the subscribers. I'll promote this channel on some of my other ones and we should be there too.
So this has been an interesting 24 hours, and I'm so grateful to tell you about it. Last night, I went to this Alcoholics Anonymous meeting that I used to be a member of. And I shared. Now I'm going to tell you what I shared, and then I'm going to tell you how people reacted.
What I Shared at the Meeting
At this AA meeting, everyone's talking about, yeah, serve God, and do what your sponsor tells you to. Kind of a regular meeting — the thing that turns a lot of people off of AA meetings. It feels like a cult: just do whatever you're told to do. And I got up there and shared. I got up and stood in front of a room full of like 30 or 40 people. I already knew before I shared that some people were going to hate what I had to say. And I'm like, I'm getting up there and saying it anyway. Because the theme of the meeting was, yeah, just do what you're told. I used to be so selfish and now I'm so selfless. Whatever God wants — I need to surrender my will. And yes, that stuff has a place and makes sense.
But I got up there and I said: yes, when I came into Alcoholics Anonymous, I was a selfish person who had almost no empathy or consideration for other people. And that certainly needed to change. But I went too far. Don't go too far, Tony. I'm not Mel, you are. I went too far and I became this people-pleasing, nice-guy victim all the time. Somebody's always hurting my feelings, and I just get sad and whine and cry — like I did with the videos about the queen. Like, eh, she doesn't like me, eh. You're just getting sad and whining and crying all the time and acting, oh, I'm so nice, it's all love and light. Like, no, it's not. Quit lying. Nobody is all nice and all love and light. Everybody has nasty dark sides to us. And some of it's just interpretation.
So I got up and shared. I said, I went too far and turned into this "oh, I'm so selfless" person. If I have to choose between being a selfless person who just gets used by others — trying to serve God all the time, but for some reason God always seems to be telling me what to do through other people, who for some reason seem to know what God wants me to do better than I do — then I'm swinging back. If I've got to pick between selfish and selfless, I'm going to be selfish. If I have to choose between being this groveling person who's just trying to serve other people all the time, or getting what I want, I'm going to focus on getting what I want. And I don't need to pray to any God, because I am a higher power. This is my universe. When I feel upset, I pray to myself. I say, you've got this, buddy. I don't need to worship some outside entity, because all the power is within. And I said, everybody is transient — everybody comes and goes in my life. Everybody, even family — they pass on or they're born — everybody comes and goes. I am the only constant.
Then I pointed at the wall and I said, my step 10 is easy now. I will never make myself wrong for anything ever again. Everything I do is right. I try to consider other people as much as possible in what I'm doing — but everything I do is right. And I will never guilt or shame or remorse myself over anything I've ever done or will ever do again. Everything I do is done to take care of and love myself. And I said, I don't come to AA meetings for other people. I come because it's good for me — to stay sober and to try and help someone else. Because if I'm just coming to AA to help everybody else, what happens when everybody else is nasty to you? What happens, like at this meeting, when people try to tell me that I shouldn't share the way I shared?
The Newcomer Who Walked Out
Some newcomer girl got upset — she says I was swearing too much. But what actually happened, according to me, is I was talking about being sober 10, 11 years and being afraid and getting close to cheating on my wife, and how I talked to my sponsor about that. That's the part where she got up and left. Because in my opinion, based on her behavior, she more than likely did a bunch of cheating that she felt bad about. So when I'm talking about that, she gets triggered and walks out — but she didn't want to say that. So then she says, oh, he was swearing too much. And then people come at me for swearing too much, when there's nothing in that group's rules against swearing. People try to tell me that I should share differently, that I'm scaring newcomers off. And I tell them they can reconsider their position. I will not alter how I'm sharing at all. I'm proud of how I'm sharing. How I share is heartfelt and saves lives. Their opinion means nothing to me. I laugh in their face when they tell me I should do something different.
Up in the front of the meeting last night, I said, I will never bow down and do what anybody tells me ever again. Because a lot of the people in this meeting are like, "my sponsor said I shouldn't get in a relationship for a year, so I didn't like it, but I did it anyway." And sure — that advice has some merit. But my sponsor fired me, and I will not get a sponsor who thinks they're there to tell me what to do. I've been listening to Avenged Sevenfold's "Hail to the King." I am the king. This is my reality. As evidence: everything I see around me right now is something I decided to bring into my reality. I bought this computer. I bought all this stuff. My appearance is based on how I take care of myself. Hail to the king — I am the king of my reality, and I accept no other ruler over me. And I said in this meeting, you are never going to tell me something to do that I'm going to comply with voluntarily. If you can use coercion somehow, I will use any means necessary to resist that and to do what I want to. I will not have any sponsor ever tell me what I'm going to do.
Or even like the sponsor who told me I should stop seeing that woman I had a crush on at yoga three years ago. I don't agree with that now. I should have kept seeing her. And if we happened to cheat, I should have dealt with that — instead of hurting her feelings, making myself feel bad, and not going to yoga anymore out of fear. I should have just kept seeing her. I wish I had. I wish I hadn't listened to my sponsor, whose advice sounded perfectly reasonable.
Breaking the Trance
So I got up there and shared all of that. Lots of people laughed. But when I sat down, I could feel there were some people that were very angry with what I said. It's funny, because the lead said something about sniper sharing — and then I shared. I shared to give people the knowledge that Alcoholics Anonymous is not just about putting your head down and doing what you're told. To me, in some ways, it's like tricking vulnerable people into surrendering their will to someone else. Like, oh, here — God created this problem for you, alcoholism, and here's the solution, which God also happens to have, and then these other people are going to tell you what God wants for you. Like, what? I love Alcoholics Anonymous. And I am not going to support these narratives that your sponsor is going to play God over you and that you should basically surrender all your power because "I know better." If you surrender your power, then somebody else is going to have power over you. I am a believer in that, and I am a believer in helping people be empowered. That's my purpose here — to help you find your true power. I want powerful individuals who can stand up against hypocrisy, who demand the truth, who create reality — not compliant bots that do whatever they're told and believe whatever they're told to believe. That's what I offer. That's why I'm here. And I must lead by example.
I acknowledge that over the last few years, I lost a lot of my power. That's one reason my ex-wife divorced me and found me unattractive — because I had grown into this weak, groveling man that tried to just people-please and get everybody to get along. She wasn't attracted to that anymore. And now I'm getting back into who I was before she met me, with a bit more empathy and consideration of others.
The power when I shared that last night — I felt just a huge energy. I was the only memorable part of that meeting for most people. Maybe people remember their own shares, but I was the most interesting and alive part of that meeting. I broke people's trance. People do so many things in life — AA is just one of them, like drinking, like music, so many things people listen to — where the whole goal is to put yourself into a trance and essentially go to sleep and be a bot. And I broke people's trance. Getting up there and saying what I said, I sat down and I could feel the energy. Some people loved what I said and felt empowered by it. Some people were so upset they were ready to come punch me. And one guy shared that exact thing. A guy that is at least 20 years older than me got so upset that he was shaking during the meeting and was afraid that he was going to come hit me while I was sharing.
"You Are Retarded" — and I Laughed
Then somebody else who I know very well comes up to me after the meeting. This guy can barely speak to me, he's so angry. He ends up saying — and I quote — because I said, "I am a genius," he shouts at me, "You are retarded." And I laughed in his face when he said that. This is a guy that could certainly wreck my pretty little face if he got off a punch. I laughed in his face several times, and that only infuriated him more. Because I said to him, is there anything you could say to me that would make me as upset as you are right now? He said no. And I said, that's right. Because I have a level of strength and a holding onto my reality and my frame that nothing you're going to do is going to bother me that much. If you try to hit me, I'm going to run. And then I'm going to retaliate by calling the police and saying that you tried to assault me — especially if you actually connect with a punch. I'm very much going to stand up for myself. I'm not going to let you get away with trying to hit me, especially not because you are angry and losing control of yourself.
There were several people in the meeting that were so angry they were ready to fight. And I told this guy, I said, how powerful is that? That me sharing got a guy in his 60s so full of energy that he's ready to fight? That is a powerful message that I delivered. And while some of the people are thinking that I'm the problem, it's like — I am the solution. I'm the savior. I'm here to show you how powerful you are. And often the first reaction is to get pissed off. The first reaction lots of people have when somebody says something that invigorates them is to get angry, to get defensive: you are challenging me. And I challenged, especially the men in the room — I challenged the men to be stronger. Because men often get stronger by challenging each other. That's why we do things like sports where we compete. That's why men tend to like things like football and basketball — sports where we challenge each other. Men tend to get stronger by challenging each other.
"You're on Your Way to Getting Banned"
And what's funny — this one guy said, your message is very well received in the men's meeting, but you shouldn't be sharing that here. I'm like, why? And he says, well, because there's newcomers. I'm like, that's invalid, because there are newcomer men all the time. What bothers you is that I'm challenging these women in this room also. The 5 or 10 women in the room — maybe 10, 15 — I'm challenging these women with what I'm saying also, and that bothers you, because then you're thinking you have to protect them. And challenging people is very useful. A lot of the big transformations I've had in life have been when people challenged me. Because how do you change when everybody goes along with you? How do you change when everybody goes along with what you want to do? There's no incentive to change or reconsider your position when everything's going how you want.
And the guy said, you are on your way to getting banned from this meeting. I'm like, really? I'm on my way to getting banned from this meeting for sharing for three minutes at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, and other people are getting pissed off? Like, really? I told you what I said — you can see how some people would be taking offense to that in a meeting. And this guy's perspective is like, oh, you're running off all the newcomers. I'm like, there might be a newcomer that hears what I say and wants exactly that. I want that newcomer. I don't want these other groveling people. Because one reason I was very hesitant to get sober in Alcoholics Anonymous is that I thought I'd have to conform and be a weak little man. And what's kind of disappointing is to see how much that did materialize. I was so desperate to live — alcohol was ruining my life so much — that I did end up turning into this weak little people-pleasing man that just tried to do anything to avoid an argument with my wife. I'd keep things to myself and not talk about them, get my feelings hurt and not react, but be resentful and be manipulative because of that. A man who was just sitting in AA meetings sharing what everybody else was saying. And now I feel like I've come into my power.
This kind of power — we need this. Especially men, but all people need to be in their power. In my view, our whole system is set up to make men disempowered, agreeable, groveling, weak little creatures. And then there are all these women desperate to find a real powerful man that really turns her on from his masculine power, saying, I can't even find a real man anymore, because the men have just been crushed and convinced to go along and be agreeable. All right — I better not go too far. Don't go too far, Tony. I'm not Mel, you are. Don't go too far with what I'm saying here.
So I'm really proud of what I shared at that AA meeting. I felt this surge of power — it was an adrenaline dump when I shared. My body was scared to get up there and share, to realize that there are people that are going to hate what I'm saying and will try to retaliate by getting me banned from the meeting, by telling me I should share differently.
"Your Life Is a Disaster" — Let's Look at the Numbers
This guy also yelled at me and said, your life is a disaster, you don't have any money, and you just got divorced last year. This is the same guy that called me a retard. Now, this is a guy I actually like, and we've known each other for years, since he was in his early sobriety. I've been there to support him. And certainly other people feel the same way he does. Was I affected by that? I said, I've got thousands of dollars in credit. That's a big difference from no money. I've got at least $40,000 in business credit, and maybe at this point I'm down to $30,000 or $40,000 in personal credit. And I've got money coming in thanks to my new YouTube partnership, thanks to the channels, thanks to those of you supporting — somebody dropped tips yesterday. Over $100 came in yesterday on jerrybanfield.com, which I'm really grateful for. And somebody bought my book Officer Banfield that I just put up — actually, it's the same person, Zenith. He bought Officer Banfield and he bought the community chat. I'm really grateful.
The Queen, the Scrambler, and the Waiting Game
For those of you interested in the story with the queen: I realized I need to ask the queen if she's okay with me releasing the video. If she is, I will absolutely release it, and I'll put it for sale on my website. Anybody who wants to buy it can buy it and roast it and do whatever they want with it. So I messaged her yesterday. I was following the Scrambler routine by Bobby Rio, and she literally — I said during the video what it predicted, and she literally replied exactly what it said she would reply. So I sent her a message saying I was going to a meeting, that I'd tell her everything in a minute. And I'm intentionally taking an entire day to not reply at all today or follow up, because I have other stuff I'm doing. I don't need to. I don't think it's that urgent for her. And then I'll send her a voice memo. It's funny — I was so emotionally invested in this woman a month ago when I met her, and it's amazing how I've just pulled all that back. Because me being strong means I hold my love and my emotional energy, and I'm very careful where I deploy it.
I've got a call scheduled with a woman I went out with a couple of days ago, which is great — I'm looking forward to talking to her. And then I've got a phone number that my friend gave me from her friend. And it's funny — at a certain level of my strength and power, I just kind of play the game. I'm like, that's cool, I got that phone number. I'm not in any hurry for this phone number. In fact, I'll take several days to even reach out. You're like, how many women are you talking about right now? I'm going to take several days to use this new phone number, because this mutual friend already told her about me. She already said she wanted to go on a date. She already gave over her number. I want to give her some time to wonder: is this guy even going to contact me? What happened? Why is he not messaging me? I want to start off immediately like that, so that whenever she does get a message, it's like — finally. So that she experienced some doubt as to whether I was going to reach out at all. And I've got enough stuff I'm doing. I'm not in the mood. I'll do it when I'm in the mood later. I'll do it when I feel like it. And it feels really good. It feels like everything is just coming together perfectly.
Power Yoga, Five Videos, and Six-Month Money
I got up this morning and went to a power yoga flow and had a great workout. Saw a friend and her husband there, and did not see the queen there. This is the fifth video I've filmed today — fifth or sixth long-format video — over an hour of content filmed. Today I'm going to pick my son up from school, take my daughter to basketball, and show off for the hot moms at basketball.
And it's funny, because I say that I'm a genius. I say that I've got fantastic potential and I'm going to make a lot of money in the next six months. I don't know exactly how — whether it's going to be selling YouTube coaching on my website, books, ICP price pumping, or YouTube going off. I don't know exactly how, but I'm in position to make lots of money. I see how people can think that I'm crazy. And yet I have a life I'm proud of. I'm talking to more women than I've ever talked to before, and the quality of the women I'm talking to is amazing — beautiful, intelligent, successful women in the eyes of the world. I'm not even sure exactly how many I'm talking to that might come over, that I've gone out with — it's at least five, maybe ten right now. And the single mom that canceled on me last minute? I sent her one message to say, I understand, I'm a single dad. She sent a message back. I didn't even reply to her. I don't need to. I don't want it that bad.
Was It All for the Content?
Like, I don't need it that bad. It's funny how I was a month ago. And now the craziest thing — I look back at the whole saga with the queen and it's like, did you — I certainly felt a lot of feelings for her, but what was the primary motivation? Were you just trying to make some YouTube content? Because it was the saga with the queen that made my dating channel and my Jerry Banfield channel — both of those channels went off from dating her. And I remember, right before that, setting the intention: I'll do whatever it takes, show me what to do, I'll do what I need to do to bring in my money and build my following. And then I meet her right after that. So it's like, all right — did all of this with her happen naturally, something that would have happened even if you weren't doing YouTube? Or is it something that happened because you're doing YouTube? It literally generated a month of material for YouTube that helped monetize this entire channel, that taught me a lot of lessons I could then teach on my dating channel. It's helped me become a better person, and it's helped me become a strong, powerful man. It is kind of sad, though. I'm like, oh, I used to have so many feelings for the queen, and I feel almost nothing now. And it's like, wow — that feels powerful.
The Pendulum
But it's also like this: one guy stayed after the meeting and had a really nice heartfelt conversation with me last night. He said, I think you've swung too far back in the other direction. There is a way to lead and love with your heart and also have a spine. And maybe I could bounce a little bit. Maybe I do swing between extremes like a pendulum. I really want to have a heartfelt life, but one where I also have a spine and I'm not taken advantage of. Right now, the spine and the head-controlled, mental, logically-led life is locked in and zeroed in rock solid. And maybe if I can gently swing back to be a little more heartfelt, that'll be fine. But I'm really happy where I'm at today, and I'm grateful for what I'm teaching.
I'm really grateful for all you've done to get this YouTube channel monetized — my third YouTube channel that's a partner. I think this is my sixth or maybe seventh channel that I've had as a partner since I've been on YouTube. So thank you for all your love and support. I'm here for you whenever you want me. I'm available at jerrybanfield.com to talk, to chat with — I've got everything for you there. Really appreciate your support.
And if you want to follow this whole journey day by day — the meetings, the queen saga, the channels getting monetized, all of it — every one of these vlogs lives on my Daily Vlogs playlist.